England Consider Cryogenic Storage

Following the "Fredaloe Affair" and Michael Vaughan's latest injury scare, the England management are turning to space-age technology in a bid to stave off further problems. Following Saturday's match against Kenya, instead of returning to their hotel rooms, Freddie Flintoff and Michael Vaughan will be frozen in CryoGenic storage until needed again. Duncan Fletcher commented, "It removes a big headache for the England management, we will have a fit team for the next game and the players will be fully rested...... it does make pre-match planning a little difficult, though."

A transcript of a conversation between two Caribbean groundsmen shortly before Michael Vaughan's latest injury scare has come to light :

Groundsman A : "Ya know, maybe we shuld do someting about da 'ole in da ground, man, somebody gonna get hurt."
Groundsman B : "No worries, man, I got it covered. I got dis sign"
Groundsman A (Reading Sign) : "NO RUNNING ON PITCH", "Ya man, dat will do it"